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Shopping....
The only things I like shopping for is food! I never enjoyed "shopping". My mother, who loved shopping, could not get over the fact that her daughter did not want to go shopping with her. After trying numerous times to get me going with her, without success, she eventually blew up, throwing at me: “You are just not a woman!"...

Why do I bring this up? Because they have completely ruined my weekly shopping at the local supermarket. There is a miserable little man, who being the doorman of this establishment feels it is his right to dictate to the customers. He will not allow me to take in my little trolly, but he insists that I take one of their wagons. They are huge! I did try one and just could not handle it! I swear it has got a life of its own and I had to run after it! So, I gave up and came back with my little "Cadillac!" No way! He made such a fuss that I ran away! So, I was told to try one of the little "pullies" which the supermarket also supplies... Impossible! It somehow managed to tip over and... Don't ask! It was so embarrassing that I did not go in there for a couple of weeks! But eventually I had to, so before having another fight, I went hunting for the manager and found her! A huge Russian woman with the Russian attitude! "Rules and regulations" said this paragon and left me standing there with my mouth wide open, walking away!

It is the only market around, so I have no choice, but I no longer enjoy shopping in that supermarket and go in and out quickly only for basic stuff that I can not get anywhere else, like meat and fish, which is very annoying... I picked up four lovely plump chicken breasts the other day. Breasts? Oh dear... I was late and in a hurry, so did them very quickly, but the L&M said that he never ate something so delicious! So, give it a try: oil into a pan and add chopped garlic. Sliced mushrooms went in next and the chick right away on top of the mushrooms; salt-pepper and a bit of gin (I find that mushrooms and gin are a happy marriage!). Cover it and let it steam for 10 minutes or so; then flip the chick over, cover again and give it another 10-15 minutes, depending on the thickness of the boobs... They were really marvellous and as I said, the L&M was delighted. Oh yes! I was too and although I do not like the white part of the chicken and he does, it was so "juicy" and tasty that one had to enjoy it!!

I also bought some chopped meat. When I pointed out to the butcher which meat I want him to grind for me, he agreed that it was a good choice, because it had some fat in it. Yes, said I, please remove it! And his face fell and did I get a lecture! First he wanted to know what I would be making; when I told him, he exploded. “Then you must have a bit of fat in the meat, other ways it will be dry!"... Back and forth we went and I finally told him to do what he thinks is right and was able to move on and get out!

I made something different this time; I had some "bits" of sauce in the freezer; remember how I told you to collect your bits of sauce and freeze them in ice cube trays?... Never ever throw a bit of sauce away! It will always come in handy! If you need just a bit of sauce, you take out a cube or two, and do not need to defrost all of it, see?... So, I defrosted the sauce and cut into it cherry tomatoes; simmered covered for a while, then made patties from the chopped meat (the meat mixed the usual way you make hamburgers) and flopped them gently into the sauce, added a can of chick peas, with just a bit of its juice, covered the pan and simmered for about half an hour (can be longer)... It was a lovely mixture and something new. I had three patties left over, so a few days ego, we both felt like having something fattening; a "soul-food" sort of a dish! I heated some oil in a pan, added chopped garlic, mashed up the patties and in they went; mix-mix. I had a potato in the fridge, so grated that on top of the meat, mix-mix some more. Let it get good and friendly together, because now, make the top nice and smooth and brake four eggs over it; salt-pepper and a bit or red paprika, only because it looks so lovely!... Cover the pan for a few minutes until the eggs are poached and hey presto! The best soul-food ever!

And we thought that we put the cauliflower to sleep for good, did we now? Nah! This was in the Observer newspaper: "Who would have thought that cauliflower - which was traditionally served under what chef Jean Conil described in his 1953 book Haute Cuisine as “a merciful disguise of sauce" - might one day be so celebrated it would be served proudly whole and slow-roasted, like a prime cut of beef?"....

AND: a reader took me to task: "How could you forget to mention your best cauliflower recipe? The one which is first boiled in water, fried in butter and then poached eggs go on top?"... True, I did forget and I am sorry! But it gave me the idea to poach the eggs on top of the meat-potato-mix! So, thank you!

Send your questions to The Wacky Cook: email: debbiemorgenshtern@gmail.com      

Debbie Morgenstern is the author of "My Life in Israel" and other short stories.
"My Life in Israel" can be purchased by accessing this link: "My Life in Israel"