Quick deserts...
When I came to America so many, many years ago, I discovered apple pie; I could not get enough of it! I became totally addicted to it...but, dieting as I have done since the age of twelve, when I discovered food, and swelled into a round ball...I could not let myself go completely! It was terribly difficult and most of the time, I could not resist it! There are dozens of different apple pies all over America, and everybody makes a different one, and they are all delicious! And, people discovered my weakness, and made apple pie for me whenever they could. I was working and studying at that time in NY, and one day, I discovered at Lerner's on 5th Avenue, down stairs in their cafeteria, that you could have a slice of apple pie with coffee for 15 cents! Can you imagine how long ago that was?! Boggles the mind, it really does...I mean, we are talking history here!...but, at that time, as I was on a very strict budget, and dieting, as always, was in "in-place" for me... apple pie, with coffee, became my daily lunch!

I have not made many apple pies; maybe one or two; my aversion to dough probably has something to do with it..."apple-pie" needs a bottom and a top crust, and I simply can not cope with that!...But, we needed a desert the other day, and a quick one at that, and I had apples at home...so I made the following one, and it was very easy, very successful and very delicious! The L&M, who is the 'mavin' of apple pies from way back...the cook in his parents home in NY made the best in the world! There was no better apple pie then Gertrude's, a Jamaican lady, who had absolutely nothing to do with American food or pies...but, there you have it...and I must attest to it: her apple pie, was the best!...anyway: the L&M, pronounced my new effort "ecxellent! The best ever!"... so here it is: give it a try: buy some short-crust-pastry, I had some in the freezer, or make some, if you absolutely insist...and line a pie dish with it. Peel, core and slice four large green apples...add the zest of one lemon and the juice of the same lemon; add a cup of white sugar, and one beaten egg; just DO it!...mix all this together, pour into the pastry lined pie dish, smooth it and bake for 40 minutes...and that is IT! Can you imagine anything simpler? You can serve it hot, or cold, with ice cream or not...I served it warm the first time, cold with a small scoop of ice cream, the next day...it was pronounced by one and all, delicious!

Lemon meringue pie was the L&Ms favorite; I used to make it for him for all the special occasions in his life; I do not think I ever made it here in Israel... we did, once or twice when the children were small...and we still "cooked" and "baked" together just for the fun of it...so, maybe yes, when we wanted to make something "special" for Daddy we took our time at that...but, there is quite a bit of work in a pie like that, the base, the cooking of the custard, the topping...definitely against my religion to do all that now! Unless you want to, then go ahead; knock yourself out...those two below, one "parve, and one dairy, are quick, and delicious! Lemons are my weakness and I always have them at home in abundance... this "parve" one, I decided to try out and it worked! Make a crumbly mix of any crushed biscuits, I had chocolate ones...and some melted margarine; you can crush nuts with the biscuits if you want to...or not; I did...line your pie dish with that messy mess...keep in the fridge; into your mixer bowl grate the zest of two lemons; juice both lemons; to the zest, add two Rich creams, and one cup of sugar; beat until it forms peaks; add slowly, ONE vanilla pudding, and the juice of the lemons, as you continue beating on high, one tablespoon at a time; you should have about 8 tablespoons of the juice...pour into the pie crust, and refrigerate. Best, the next day...I placed the rest of it into the freezer, and it did NOT freeze up; remained a soft deliciously-creamy-lemony pie.

The other one I found in an English magazine; bless the Brits for making something so easy!...you crush vanilla biscuits with some ginger powder, mix with melted butter and line a pie dish with that!...now: into a mixer go: one large can of sweetened condensed milk, the zest of three lemons...yes; three!...add seven large spoons of lemon juice; beat this until it starts to thicken; whip up a cup of double cream, mix with the lemon mixture and pour into the 'crumply' pie base...refrigerate; again, much better the next day...worth while to make fish for dinner, to be able to serve that for dessert...I actually did not have time to whip the cream separately, so I dumped it all together and beat the hell-out-of-it...do NOT do it; the pie did not really 'harden' as it should, it was a delicious 'soft' pie, but, again, I put it into the freezer, and the next day, it was a wonderful ice-cream-pie!

Send your questions to The Wacky Cook: email: POOP_1@netvision.net.il      

Debbie Morgenstern is the author of "My Life in Israel" and other short stories.